Make it stand out

Energy Takers vs. Energy Creators

You know what NBA teams do as soon as they get the new season schedule? They circle when they’re up against their rival teams. We all do this to some extent. We do this with friends, colleagues, clients, family, and enemies. We circle them red ink in our mental weekly or yearly calendars.

Why? With them, we need to create more energy before and after interacting. We may even play out how the interaction a hundred times, finding different ways to conform ourselves to save our energy.

You know a dirty secret though? We’re often unaware we are doing this. We’re unaware of how much energy expenditure we’re creating on people. It’s also completely possible it’s the other way around: we’re unaware of how much energy we’re taking from others. Around the holidays, often this give and take of energy resources becomes even more pronounced.

If you’re unsure of whether you’re falling into this, try thinking about it this way. When you’re not around this person, how much time are you spending on them? How much energy? And here’s a deeper question…is it possible that you are exerting energy doing something else to prevent yourself from thinking about them? For example, does drinking, weed, or porn consumption increase during the holidays? Because all those are energy takers too.

So, what can you do about this? —I’m also going to give a warning: this exercise may cause shifts in your life because for you to complete a loop, it’ll need to move from internal to external— Ready to gain more energy in your life?

Exercise:

To preserve energy, we’re used to mentally rehearsing what will happen from what has happened, so I want you to do the opposite. First, sit in any comfortable position. I recommend being by yourself and having the fewest possible distractions around you, even pets and ambient noise. Now I want you to take your time to fixate (meditate) on something you want to have happen. I want you to be as specific as possible with your mental imagery, including smells, tastes, and noises.

So if you’re worried about a holiday get together with family, instead of thinking of what could happen, instead focus on what you’d like to happen during your holiday. Your imagery may not have anything to do with family. You may imagine being by yourself in Bora Bora or being surrounded by loving strangers catching catfish in Alaska. Your image doesn’t need to make sense. In fact, the less sense it makes the more it’s YOUR image and YOUR energy!

Once again, be as specific as possible of what your heart craves and desires. Once you’ve got this snapshot, and likely, series of snapshots (forming a small video), direct your heart’s attention towards the feeling(s) that’s being captured. Is it “love,” “joy,” “support,” “relief,” “gratitude,” “expansiveness,” “freedom,” etc.? There will be one specific feeling capture that will resonate the most in your body.

As you direct your energy towards the captured feeling, you will have a bodily response. Your breaths in and out will also become more elongated, and likely your nasal passages will evenly open with your heart congruence towards that feeling. Parts of your body will resonate, naturally stretching themselves out, feeling warmth or light, sometimes experiencing colors and weightlessness.

Stay with this feeling as long as possible. Play with it. Allow it to move up and down your body from your toes to the crown of your head. Let that energy attune to specific areas and move it around again, eventually nestling in. Focus on the images and feeling as long as possible, whether it’s for five seconds or ten minutes. You can always come back to the sensations once it’s been established.

—

Here’s the fun part: you’ll notice this energy play out in real life. If you meditated on “freedom,” you’ll now notice particular interactions where you can create energy with freedom. You’ll also notice if someone is infringing on your freedom, or taking energy. You’ll also notice how you can bring freedom into these interactions.

From here, you’ll see a predicament. You can either attune to the flow of this new energy or you can attune to the energy from before. However, this time it’s your choice. You can choose the emotion you want to experience…or rather, you can choose the experience you want to experience. What energy and life do you want to experience? What reality do you want to create for yourself and others?

Energy Takers vs. Energy Creators